Hi,
I was talking one day with my girlfriend about kindness and generosity and she asked me the question:
- How do you be kind and give without expecting anything in return?
It’s a topic that I write about in detail in my book The Secret Code of Success – The JeDI Code and it’s one of the core principles: Be Stubborn!
The charity to which I refer here is a much broader concept. I’m not just talking about the material, but it can take many forms. In caring for the sick and suffering, in love, in a kind thought, a kind word, in giving the other person space to express themselves.
In almost every personal development book I have read, the subject of gentleness invariably came up. I have to admit that at first I didn’t fully understand the almost obsessive emphasis on the idea of giftedness. It seemed too natural and normal to me personally.
My brother and I grew up in a loving environment, thanks to my mother and grandmother, but also with great material problems. My mother confessed to me that there were days when we had only milk and bread in the house, but it was enough to keep us hungry. The hardships we were going through were a strong bond. We were together and had to get through the hard times. We looked after each other and shared what little we had.
When I was growing up, I saw brothers and sisters who didn’t get along at all. They argued and even fought over nothing. I couldn’t understand how that was possible between siblings. I thought, in my naivety, that everyone behaved the way my brother and I did.
Then, I have seen the same behavior among adults, either in work or personal relationships. Strained relationships between colleagues, relatives, friends. Relationships based on interest, where if something is given, the expectation is that they will get something extra in return, material or emotional.
For me it was a wake-up moment.
The question I want to ask you is:
What is the first reaction, the first feeling, the first thought you have when you give something away?
Option 1: What do I get in return? (You owe me now! People see me doing a good deed).
Option 2: I’m glad I helped you and that you’re okay. I expect nothing in return.
It is very normal for many people that option 2 does not come naturally. I would love it, though, if you would make an effort to change that feeling.
How? By listening to your feelings often. By introspection. Listen to your heart and mind when you do a good deed, when you give. Change your mindset towards option 2. Do it in small but consistent steps until it becomes a way of life.
Why? Do you want to be surrounded by people who care about you and will support you when you need it most? Do you want plenty of wealth, but also an emotional balance that brings you complete satisfaction? Do you want to live in harmony?
Then you already have the answer.
If the help does not come from the soul, from within your being, and if the generosity is not accompanied by emotion, by the desire to do good in thought and word, then it is like an empty promise, without substance. It is not important to pass the test of appearances.
You need to convince yourself, not others!
In order to achieve harmony, your heart and mind must be satisfied that you have done everything you need to do to live in harmony with your surroundings.
This is my conviction and I propose you join me.
Apply the Code principle: Be generous!
Givește emoțemotional și material. Ți va va întoarce înzecit
Claudiu
