I invited you in the previous article to smile. To smile with or without reason, as an act of resistance in a too serious world, a sign that we are connected, that we are present.
I have said before that I would like to elaborate on the idea of presence, a fashionable term, a kind of mantra, repeated so many times that it risks losing its force, becoming a cliché. But it doesn’t make it any less true. Perhaps, on the contrary, it is precisely the frequency with which we encounter it that shows us how much we long for it.
But what is presence?
Took me a while to figure it out. And, frankly, I’m still figuring it out. I asked questions left and right. Every answer sounded familiar, but none seemed complete. Because presence isn’t just an idea. It’s a state. And like any deep state, it’s cultivated. It takes a lot of practice.
Sure, there are people who find it natural to be present in their lives, but for most of us it takes a conscious effort.
In psychological terms, presence is the ability to be truly here, aware, attentive and connected to the present moment.
But what does that mean in concrete terms?
Presence in your life means:
- not to run away from your emotions, but to observe them gently,
- not to get lost in the past or anxious about the future, but to breathe in the now,
- to respond, not just react,
- pay attention to what you feel, think and do with intention.
I mean being alive. Being here.
Whew!!! Presence seems to cover the whole spectrum of our existence: emotions, thoughts, words, deeds. It doesn’t seem and I don’t think it is a simple task.
I don’t know if we have yet found that state of presence at all levels, especially because we live in an age where our attention is distributed, where the ability to multitask is worn like a crown, where companies spend millions to find ways to get our attention, to keep our eyes and minds on the screen, on our phone, on any device that promotes products, services or simply reels of a wide variety of quality.
I admit, I often fall into this trap myself. But I’m learning not to judge myself. Just to come back. Come back to myself. To now.
And I have learned one simple thing: presence is not approached holistically, as a whole, but practiced step by step. Like a dance.
So we started small:
- a smile in the morning before thoughts;
- a coffee sipped in peace with a book;
- a meal without a phone, just with me or my loved ones;
- an honest response instead of a knee-jerk reaction.
- to be there, present in the conversation with my girlfriend or my children.
You may already know that I’m a big fan of Stoic philosophy. Seneca wrote: “All life is divided between hope and remembrance; no one lives in the present.” So in over 2000 years, mankind still hasn’t learned how to live in the present. It gives me pause, but at the same time it gives me hope.
Maybe presence isn’t about doing everything perfectly. It’s about being. About feeling alive in your own body, in your own heart, in your own moment.
Eckhart Tolle, a master of contemporary presence, says: “Where are you? Here. What time is it? It is now. What are you? This moment.”
So I invite you – and I invite myself – to come back to you, through simple things. Through conscious breathing. Through meaningful silences. Through sincere glances. Through choices made with intention.
Here. Now. This moment.
A day with presence!
Claudiu
